Crisis of Infinite Books

I read a lot — so much that all my books are subject to the 100-page rule: If I don’t care what’s happening by the 100th page, then I’m done. Life is short, and I’d like to get to the good shit before my vision goes. Obviously, comic books make up a massive portion of my literary diet. To deepen my knowledge and beef up my continuity chops, I often read trade volumes of classic stories that my fellow geeks recommend.

Enter Crisis on Infinite Earths. I am on page 102, and I’m bored. I don’t give a damn what happens next, and I am certain I could find a WAY more amusing summation on somebody’s blog. But the Geek Posse has spoken. They say that I should plow through my apathy and finish the friggin’ book. Some think it’s a great story, but I don’t share their affinity for retro-fitted fan whoring.

Perhaps I just have general Crisis Fatigue, or maybe the story is so convoluted and shallow that my brain is insulted. The obsessive part of me wants to read it because I feel I should. As a fangirl who primarily reads DC comics and now writes about them, it’s like my duty or something. Maybe it would help me make sense of Grant Morrison’s reference rodeos. Frankly, that’s my only motivation to finish.

So here’s the question: Do I spend precious moments of my life on the next 250 pages of this classic book, or do I move on to one of the many other trades waiting for me?

16 thoughts on “Crisis of Infinite Books

  1. You should at least skim through the rest of it in order to see Earth-2 Superman beat up the Anti-Monitor by throwing planets at him.

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    • Skimming sounds less painful. And really? Throwing planets? Why does the Anti-Monitor always have to be in the mix? I mean, I guess Crisis probably set the precedent. But his giant manga robot looking ass always has to be there. My irritation comes from Death of the New Gods which, btw, if I haven’t already told you … sucks. You guys were right. It’s not that I didn’t believe you. It’s just, I didn’t think it was going to be THAT bad. I digress …

      I will do whatever the readers of the blog think I should do. SO, if the vote is for me to finish. Then I will.

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      • Well, the Anti-Monitor was introduced in CoIE, so what’s old and tired to you after Infinite Crisis, Final Crisis, and Blackest Night, was fresh and innovative back in 1985 (at least, in theory).

        I think that Kal-L throwing planets at the Anti-Monitor is awesome, but I completely accept the utter ridiculousness of it. It’s sort of the jet-pack with gatlin guns moment, if you will. ;)

        The bowl of terrible that was Death of the New Gods is something that I think you had to experience firsthand in order to grasp the true depth of how rancid it really is. I don’t think that there are words in the English language that truly capture its awfulness.

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        • *Le MEOW* (eh hem, that was my version of LMAO)

          DUDE! The jet-pack with gatlin guns was … awesome. Hmmm …

          Yeah, DotNG accentuates my foul mouth. Oh wait, it was already like that. Whatevs. I think Grant Morrison should be allowed to kick Starlin anywhere he pleases for that bullshit. Then slap DiDio for allowing it.

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      • As the All-American Rejects put it, “Move Along.” I read the whole thing about two years ago, and it was a dull, brain-numbing task. I’ll never get those hours of my life back, but it’s not too late for you, V.

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  2. I voted for you to move on. One of your biggest roadblocks is that you already know what’s going to happen and are working backwards. The story works best when you live and breathe all the infinite earths, and then *WHAM!* everything changes. Then you have an issue or two exploration of what has changed. You already know the result, so you lose a lot.

    Additionally, you’re using Grant’s steaming pile of crap as a reference to this book. You’re actually insulting Crisis on Infinite Earths by making the comparison. Put it out of it’s misery. Leave it on the pedestal it belongs on, then climb the ladder down to Grant’s garbage. :P

    The Irredeemable Shag
    http://onceuponageek.com

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    • I stand by Grant … in all of his crazy. And, we’ll see how I feel about him after Doom Patrol. ;-)

      I dunno if you read my comment to Chocotaco, but Death of the New Gods is SO EFFING AWFUL. It’s not even like Troll 2, so awful it’s awesome. I mean even for continuity sake, it’s garbage. None of what happened in it matters now anyway after Blackest Night. You guys totally told me so.

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  3. I forgot where pg.102 is. I dropped it after the Anti-Monitor back-up plan was foiled. Supergirl’s death and the foiling of his first plan was worth the hype. But then he starts pumping out back-up plans (whereas there was SO much build up with the first plan) that it felt like he was starting to grasp at straws.

    I also read it to find out what was up with the Anti-Monitor. It seems repetition is just his thing.

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    • Batgirl was busy feeling sorry for herself and envying Supergirl’s powers. Bleh! Lady Quark watched her man get erased from existence, and the green hooded guy saved her. Something about lessening his damnation. Cut to when Dr. Light becomes Dr. Light.

      I got irritated reading Batgirl’s pity party … I just couldn’t shake it.

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  4. I like the art so I got through it. I remember that it was long but had no BIG payoff in the end, except that you can say you read it. I voted for you to read it because I’m a jerk. Hehe Just got an idea for a shirt “I survived reading Crisis on Infinite Earths.

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  5. I was originally going to suggest finishing it because it’s a classic, but then I realized: if this were a *new* book, I’d recommend only reading it if you really wanted to (and not just because it’s “important”). If you’re not reading it *for* research/historical reasons, why should the publication date make a difference?

    So you know what? If you don’t like it, I say don’t worry about finishing.

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  6. It definitely is not the timeless text that so many other collected editions are held up as. That said — it’s been more relevant the last ten years than ever before, so if you’re up on your DC comics, it’s a better read than I think it otherwise would be. The retroactive meter should trigger repeatedly as you work your way through, but it’s a slow start with mixed rewards, I think.

    It’s the kind of book that’s a lot more fulfilling if you’re inflecting a lot of the meanings that come from the last twenty years. Good history to know, but not the kind of story you’ll want to read again and again without a reason. If you’ve got Infinite Crisis, Final Crisis, Blackest Night, and various other contemporary DC stories in mind, you’ll get something out of it.

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  7. I did my part to save you from CoIE, but it’s still 50/50. God help you.

    Skip to History of the DC Universe. It’s like a pretty documentary, and tells you everything you didn’t really need to know anyway.

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  8. Pingback: Tyranny of the Crisis « Girls Gone Geek

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