Dear Brightest Day:

From the beginning, this was a marriage of convenience. You were the next big thing in event comics; I wanted to remain in the DC loop. I’d already dropped some middling books from my pull list (See ya, Green Lantern!), so I figured there was room for you in my life. Surely, we could work through my event fatigue issues together — especially with Peter Tomasi and Ivan Reis in the mix.

Just make out already.

Unfortunately, there was trouble early on, starting with that frickin’ white lantern in issue #0. I knew you came with some Blackest Night baggage, but I underestimated just how damned sick I was of that whole white light business and the various candy-colored corps. “Hal Jordan again?!” I fumed, prompting my oldest kid to ask what my problem was. And why I was talking to myself.

But then, you quickly appealed to my weakness for doomed lovers Hawkman and Hawkgirl, and Martian Manhunter. You also had that muscular, swaggering art from Reis, who draws a bicep like no one’s business. For a brief, shining moment, I truly believed we were gonna go the distance. I told V. that you were making an effort, but like someone who has heard one too many excuses for a friend’s sketchy lover, she was dubious: “If you say so, girl. I’m dropping it.”

By issue #4, I began to suspect that we just weren’t that into one another. For one thing, Firestorm made himself (themselves?) a little too comfortable, and I couldn’t hear the rest of the book over the sound of Jason and Ronnie’s incessant, tedious bickering. (For the record, Jason’s kind of a dick. I know Ronnie is inadvertently responsible for his girlfriend’s death, but still.) Mera and Aquaman’s issues, which seemed rich with promise, took a turn for the boring. Don’t even get me started on Deadman.

I’m not opposed to a little well-placed gore — I love Secret Six, after all. But when you gleefully began ripping off innocent bystanders’ heads (and limbs), it came across as desperate, and a little cheap. There was just too much going on, and it felt like a pileup of empty sturm and drang that was headed nowhere fast. It’s never a good sign on Wednesday nights when you hear yourself muttering, “I don’t have time for this.”

BD, I’m under no illusion that you need me. Heck, you can have almost any DC reader you want, you handsome, shallow devil. I just think it would be best for me to move on — y’know, see what else is out there before I start to resent the fact that you’re costing me $2.99 every other week. That’s a lot of tall Starbucks café Americanos. I’m sure you understand.

Best regards,
E. Peterman

6 thoughts on “Brightest Day: The End of the Road

  1. Ha! Going your separate ways, huh? Maybe it’s for the best.

    I still have a little bit of a “crisis phobia”. Can’t bring myself to read any of them. Well, unless you count RoBW as a crisis. But it’s more personal, like a mid-life crisis. I can handle that.


  2. So… this is sort of the reverse of the old “It’s not you, it’s me” speech. In this case Brightest Day is the problem and not yourself. ;)

    All kidding aside, great post. I agree with some points and disagree on others. But that’s the beauty of fandom, we can all like different things.

    For me personally, I’m enjoying Ronnie and Jason’s journey (they’re both being jerks for the record). I realize that’s what this is… a journey. It’s not who they are ultimately going to be. They gotta get through this drama before they can be fabulous. I’m looking forward to it.

    Again, great post. You should at least send Brightest Day a birthday card for the next few years. Then just an e-card, and then eventually nothing. That’s the polite way to break up. :)

    The Irredeemable Shag


  3. Shag, I was waiting for you to weigh in from the Firestorm corner! The art is beautiful, and it’s possible that I’m simply being impatient. If BD turns out to be some life-changing piece of work in a couple of weeks, I’ll be eating crow. Somehow, though, I don’t think that’s going to happen.

    I’ve dropped hints that I’m seeing other comics, so I hope that BD won’t take it too hard. Sometimes these things just don’t work out. :-)


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