It had to be rough being Jonathan Kent. Think about it; nothing tests a dude’s manhood quite like knowing that his 5-year-old son can hand his ass to him if he really wants to. Of course, we know that Pa Kent was the ideal dad — an agrarian Jedi type who raised his adopted son with good, Midwestern values. But surely he had those moments where he realized that he had no real cards to play. I mean, how do you ground a kid who can fly and/or crush you like a grape? And who refers to himself in the third person?

It looks like Pa Kent’s pent-up feelings of inadequacy exploded in Superboy #55 in the form of corporeal punishment. But alas, he injured himself merely by whacking Superboy’s Kryptonian buns of steel. I’ll leave it to others to determine the, um, deeply personal overtones of this cover, which is wrong in every possible way. And by “wrong,” I mean AWESOME.

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